you have to dream, you have to have a vision, and you have to set a goal for yourself that might even scare you a little because sometimes that seems far beyond your reach. then I think you have to develop a kind of resistance to rejection, and to the disappointments that are sure to come your way.
- gregory peck
i'm working on it. working on developing a resistance to our continued disappointment of not being able to buy a home here in san diego. we live in military housing and while our house is fine and in a great location, we so want to own. we want to have a house we call our own. steve works nightly (for hours) researching homes, homes that are affordable (which is kind of a joke here in san diego) and in a good location. it's hard. we don't find much and what we do find is small and a huge fixer-upper and...always over $500K. we keep finding these fixer uppers that we think we could work with but then something happens. usually it's me getting too scared, convincing steve that we just can't do it for one reason or another. but i swore to myself that this was going to be the one. this was it...this was going to be *our* house.
with each house we don't get, it's such a disappointment. i feel like it's me extinguishing our dream of owning our own home.
i don't think i've ever wanted something so bad and felt so far away from obtaining it. every day...i dream, i hope, i pray that we'll find that home that we can call our own and each time i'm disappointed to find out that the house that i thought might be it...isn't.
with all that said, i got a bunch of wonderful emails from clients and colleagues today. one client shared, Prince William never had such fabulous baby pics! i couldn't help but giggle and be so appreciative of her comments and email (and i let her know how appreciative i was). i keep thinking that those emails came today for a reason. as i dwelled on my computer problems and not getting a house (again), i countered it with the wonderful emails that i received today. it helps me shake off the disappointment a bit. i know i'll get over it. maybe even resistant to it one of these times. i know it will happen when the time is right. we will find *our house* when the time is right.
all in all, i have not a damn thing to complain about. when times are a bit disappointing, i just need to remember how lucky i am to have all that i have! not the material things. but all the things that are within and throughout. all those things that i have, that cannot be touched. truly. i am blessed.
thanks for reading.
thanks for the wonderful emails and comments.
here's a shot that i took of sky today...
- gregory peck
i'm working on it. working on developing a resistance to our continued disappointment of not being able to buy a home here in san diego. we live in military housing and while our house is fine and in a great location, we so want to own. we want to have a house we call our own. steve works nightly (for hours) researching homes, homes that are affordable (which is kind of a joke here in san diego) and in a good location. it's hard. we don't find much and what we do find is small and a huge fixer-upper and...always over $500K. we keep finding these fixer uppers that we think we could work with but then something happens. usually it's me getting too scared, convincing steve that we just can't do it for one reason or another. but i swore to myself that this was going to be the one. this was it...this was going to be *our* house.
with each house we don't get, it's such a disappointment. i feel like it's me extinguishing our dream of owning our own home.
i don't think i've ever wanted something so bad and felt so far away from obtaining it. every day...i dream, i hope, i pray that we'll find that home that we can call our own and each time i'm disappointed to find out that the house that i thought might be it...isn't.
with all that said, i got a bunch of wonderful emails from clients and colleagues today. one client shared, Prince William never had such fabulous baby pics! i couldn't help but giggle and be so appreciative of her comments and email (and i let her know how appreciative i was). i keep thinking that those emails came today for a reason. as i dwelled on my computer problems and not getting a house (again), i countered it with the wonderful emails that i received today. it helps me shake off the disappointment a bit. i know i'll get over it. maybe even resistant to it one of these times. i know it will happen when the time is right. we will find *our house* when the time is right.
all in all, i have not a damn thing to complain about. when times are a bit disappointing, i just need to remember how lucky i am to have all that i have! not the material things. but all the things that are within and throughout. all those things that i have, that cannot be touched. truly. i am blessed.
thanks for reading.
thanks for the wonderful emails and comments.
here's a shot that i took of sky today...
Instead of looking at it like its you stopping this from happening look at it as its just not the right one or quite the right time..buying a home is such a huge daunting task..finding something that is you.. and your family is difficult you want it to be just right.. my husband and I are big believers in if its right and meant to be nothing will prevent it from happening..and thats how you know its the right one.. so hang in there.. it will happen for you.. I know its disappointing and discouraging. its just not the right one yet.. you will see.. when its right it will all fall into place easily and it will be just what you want and you will be glad that you waited.. Trust me on this..
Much love
E
I agree with e. And have other advice. As a military family we've dealt with 3 Iraq deployments in 5 years; the most recent being 13 months. He was stationed at Miramar for the last one, Pendleton for the previous 2. During his last month in Iraq in January of 2006, we got orders to Okinawa. WOW. What an opportunity! We did it. And we were SO glad we didn't own a home. The choices right now if you have to go somewhere are to sell at well below what you paid (it's a "buyer's market" but that sure doesn't mean you can afford them!) or keep & rent out which is VERY difficult and can still make you lose money. I have spoken to many people here with property in San Diego and all over the country that are worried about making ends meet. We had to sell 2 cars - which wasn't difficult, and military orders get you out of a lease pretty easily. Not that you'll get orders anywhere, but you're still in the military and it could happen.
When we were looking to buy a home in 2001 I found out I was pregnant. We couldn't do both expenses at once. In hindsight, it had to have happened then; after that, it became impossible! I want a home so badly for all the reasons you have listed - but it will happen for us one day, and I have to be patient. For now I know we're together for the last years of his career and will be back in the states in 2010 - hopefully the market will be better by then. You have the right idea - the important things are in order, enjoy that! (And the stellar weather in San Diego... we miss that!!)
(hug)
I am sure you will find the perfect home soon Deb. It is there, waiting for you and the right time to come along.
Oh, Deb, I know exactly what you mean and how you feel.
My husband has been in the Corps for 11 years and we've been together for almost 10 of them, never having owned a home yet. We looked, seriously looked, into buying a home in NorCal last January and now I'm glad we didn't because we PCS to Japan (again) in July.
I know how frustrating and daunting it can all be, but I know when the time is right, it will all work out. Incidentally, I have a relative who just bought a 4bd/2bt in Riverside for $248K, new construction. However, I would gladly stay in military housing then brave the commute on the I-15. =/
-Nikki
(leilajay.com)